March 8^th, 2010

Emperor’s Lounge is located on the 2nd floor above Club Asia.  It’s really just an upper extension of Club Asia, much like Blue Nile Executive was simply an upstairs add-on to Blue Nile.   Sure, they tried to pass it off as a different club, but everyone quickly thought of it just as I described.  Emperor’s Lounge is no different.

The entrance stairs are to the right as you enter Club Asia, behind the first dance floor.  They feature spotlight dancers, slow dancing, and a runway walk with certain girls going one by one.   The décor does have an “Emperor’s Lounge” type feel to it, so I will give them that much.  When I stopped in Club Asia for my first time, last November, I don’t even think this was open yet, so I’ll have to check it out on my next trip.

Emperor’s Lounge, Angeles City, Philippines

March 7, 2010

Bedroom Bully checking in once again.  Since posting my first informative post on here, I’ve received nothing but positive responses from many people, through emails and YM’s, I’ve received a lot of “thank you’s”, “you keep it real” and “keep posting”.  So, with that said, I will continue to post my “Hints and Tips, and Things you’ll See and Hear” while in AC.
First I’ll start off with some info…it wouldn’t hurt you to learn a little Tagalog to help you on your journey, whether it be talking to a girl, getting your check after your meal, or things you might her these girls say, and you just sit there looking stupid, and the girls are laughing at your expense and you don’t even know it!
The only reason I learned Tagalog, and I mean the only fucking reason, was when I was in Korea for the first time, sitting at these Filipina Bars and there’s like a dozen girls there and I can’t understand a fucking thing that there saying, they would look at me, and then talk to there friends and then usually laugh or smile, this shit drove me crazy, so I began to learn Tagalog.  Now, I’m not fluent in the language, and I speak basic Tagalog, not the dialects from every different province, but I know more than enough to get an idea of what the fuck the girls are talking about right in front of my face, and when the girls realize that you speak/understand Tagalog, the use of Tagalog speak goes way, way down, and the English comes out, fucking hilarious.  After conferring with my wife (stunning Filipina) and Google (because her spelling isn‘t that great), I’ve got some more Tagalog words/phrases that you’ll probably hear while in AC…..

First, how to speak it properly, I’ll break it down how I learned it.  Ok, here’s a Tagalog word, “Kaunti”, I broke it down by the vowels, you would say it like this – “Kah-oon-ti”, this means “a little, or a little bit”.  This is how I self taught myself to learn/read/write Tagalog.  Simply break it down to It’s simplest forms.

Some other things about the Tagalog language,  the alphabet only has 20 letters, 5 vowels, and 15 consonants.  So understanding that, you’ll understand why it seems like it takes like 30 Tagalog words to say some of the simplest things in another language.

Ok, onto some words/terms you may hear…

Bola-Bola (Bo-la Bo-la) – means “bullshit”, like that’s/your fucking bullshit

Tanga (Tahn-gah) - means “stupid”, maybe you are

Ikaw (Ee-cow) – means “you”, like Bola-Bola ikaw, haha

OO (Oh-Oh) – means “yes”

Tahimid (Tah-he-mid) – means like “you, shut-up”

Maraming (Ma-ra-ming) – means “a lot”

Sinungaling, (Sin-uun-ga-ling) – means “liar”

Masarap (Mah-sa-rop) – means “delicious”, like “mag-masarap kantut ako, diba”, means “I’m a very delicious fuck, did you know”, haha

Mabaho (mah-bah-ho) – means “bad smell, stinky”, could be you, haha, take a shower you nasty bastard

Titi (Tee-Tee) - means “penis”, dick, cock, whatever you call it, I’m sure you have a pet name for it

Pek-Pek (Peck-Peck) – means “vagina”, pussy, cat, cock hole, sand box, wet jungle, death trap, whatever you call it

Puki (Poo-key) – means, the same as Pek-Pek

Kantut (Can-toot) – means “sex”, fucking, fuck, bone, smash, relations, whatever you fucking call it

Puwete (Poo-wet) – means “butt”, ass, pillow, butt, ba-donka-donk, 3rd hole, whatever you call it

So-So (Sue-sue) – means “breasts”, tits, fun bags, headlights, whatever you call it

Halik (Hall-ik) – means “kiss”, don’t think I need to explain any further

Puso (Poo-so) – means “heart”, uh huh, I broke your heart, see how you are!!!

Bahala ka Dyan (Bah-ha-la ka da-yon) means “whatever” usually in a pissed off manner, usually not a good thing to hear

Gutom ako (Goo-tome ah-ko) – means “I’m hungry”

Pok-Pok (Poke-Poke) – means “prostitute and or referred to as a bargirl“, this one I don’t agree with, but my wife is very certain of this one. In my eyes and mind there is a clear distinction between a “bargirl” and a “prostitute”(yes mongers have a conscience), but whatever, not my country, haha.

Busog ako (Boo-sog ah-ko) – means “I’m full”, like after you finish your meal, you’re full.

Maldita (Mall-dee-tah) – means “slut or whore”, you get it

Sankopunta (Sahnka- poon-tah) – means like “ hey, where are you going”, like the girl is talking to you, and you just get up and leave, could be good, could be bad

Kainin mo Titi ko (Kah-in-in mo tee-tee ko) – loosely means “blowjob”, always a good thing to ask before you BF

Sip-sip titi ko (Sip-sip tee-tee ko) – means, the same as a blowjob, just a faster way to say it.

Mag bayad kana (Mahg- bah-yahd-kah-nah) – means like “check please”, like how to get your check/bill after you eat your meal or whatever, I usually make like a square in the air, like I’m drawing a square with my fingers in the air, it usually works.

Gustong gusto kita (Goo-stong Goo-stow Key-tah) – means “ I really like you”, you might hear this, you might not, could be real, could be not, but what are we really in AC for, uh-huh?

Gusto talaga kita kantutin (Goo-stow tall-a-gah key-at can-toot-in) - means, “ I really want to fuck you”, always nice to hear, have heard it many times, haha.

Gusto mo ominom (Goo-stow mo omm-in-omm) - means “Do you want a drink”.

And to my favorite saying…..

Kantutan Tayo (Can-toot-tan Thai-yo) – means like “we go fuck now”, haha, so simple, 2 words, hahaha.

Ok, that’s it for that, reading that back, I said “Poo” a lot, bonus points, haha.

That’s it for tonight, and as always – happy mongering and salute!!!

March 7^th, 2010

For this month’s feature hotel, I’m going with a place my friend Alfred told me about, the Bangkok Hotel.  He has stayed there several trips now and swears to me it’s a great place at a great value.

The Bangkok Hotel is neatly located down on Lower Fields, just across from Club Asia and the Walk-about Hotel.  It is Korean owned, hence the Korean restaurant right out in front of it.  Alfred says the rooms are great, with excellent Wi-Fi for ‘net junkies like him, and the location is perfect for hardcore barhoppers.  At 1,100 pesos, it’s a great value for being situated right where it is.

If you’re a newbie going to AC soon, and you’re not sure where to stay yet, this place is a great option.  You will be right in the thick of the action, not needing to worry much about trikes, and for a budget price that can’t be beat.  Another reason I’m making this my Hotel of the Month is because it also gives me the shameless opportunity to recite one of my favorite Chinese Proverbs:   “Man who walk sideways through turnstile, always going to Bangkok.”

Bangkok Hotel, Angeles City, Philippines

March 4th, 2010

If you have a lot of extra time to kill (I mean ALOT of time), you might read through Harry the Horse’s March newsletter.  It’s mostly filled with local ex-pat type of news; stuff that mainly targets the guys living there, but you might find some tid-bits of interest.

March 3^rd, 2010

There has been quite a lot of “buzz” surrounding the 3-story bulk of concrete going up across from Kokomoz the past few months, and now it appears that the time for its opening is finally here.  In case you didn’t know, the Lewis Grand Hotel Group acquired the Dirty Duck bar a lil’ while ago, and since then, it has been one of the most rockin’ clubs on Lower Fields by most accounts; quite a resurgence to its past form after a few years of mediocrity.

This new “mega-bar”, named Forbidden City, is also owned by the LGH group, and will be initially staffed by some of the Dirty Duck girls.  There were also rumors circulating that they were “poaching” some of the hotter girls from various Perimeter bars.  That’s just what we need now, a Tupac-and-Biggie style beef between Perimeter and Fields, haha.

Forbidden City appears to be a big, spacious, show-girl type bar (think Club Atlantis), which is expected to feature choreographed “showgirl” dance routines, following the current prevailing trend by the other “mega-bars”.  Aside from the girl-poaching accusations, some have also criticized the use of a “giant Bhudda statue” decorating the bar’s entrance.

Personally, I don’t give a rat’s ass about political or religious correctness in my third world Asian girlie-bars, but I could understand how some would find that a little questionable.   If you have a problem with it, vote with your feet and stay away; leaves more ass for the rest of us uncouth heathens.

There have also been conflicting reports about the bars exact grand opening date, but according to the latest Doghouse Party schedule, they will have their weekly party at Forbidden City this Saturday, March 6^th.  If anyone is in town then, send us the latest on this place so we can spread the word.

Forbidden City Club
Lower Fields Avenue, Angeles City

March 2^nd, 2010

If you’ve been to any of these in the past like I have, you know they are a blast.  Food, drinks, music, female boxing and girls galore—-and all in and around the pimped out Angeles Beach Club Hotel swimming pool.    Here’s what you need to know:

Who: You and 100+ Angeles City girls from the Fields & Perimeter Bars

What: Wet & Wild Boxing: Round 4

When: Friday, March 12th, from 12:00 noon to 5:30 p.m.

Where: ABC Hotel Beach Pool

Why: To raise & donate 100% of the profits to the local “Duyan Ni Maria Orphanage”

Cost: P1,000 per person / P500 for ladies

Contact ABC Hotel for any more questions or details.

Wet & Wild Boxing – Round 4
ABC Hotel – March 12th 2010

March 1^st, 2010

Ahh, I always love the 1^st of the month.  A new month means new photo albums here on the Funpage.  First, we have another batch of barhop photos from long-time AC photographer extraordinaire, Don Wong.  In it, you will find ample doses of LBFM tits & ass for your reminiscing pleasure.

For the Girl-of-the-Month, we present a rather popular AC girl named Elsa from AsianHookers.com.  She has been around for a few years now, going from Blue Nile Club in AC, to Wet Spot Bar in Subic and back again.   Aside from her lovely, rich brown skin, she sports one of the nicest sets of natural breasts around.  No, they’re not gargantuan in size, they are simply just “nice” in shape and proportion.   The kind you just wanna grab onto and squeeze.   (I have felt them personally, so I think I’m qualified to say that)

AC Barhop Pics by Don – March 2010
100 Photos

Elsa – Girl of the Month – March 2010
AsianHookers.com

March 1, 2010

The Bedroom Bully checkin’ in……First off, I’ve been asked to supply my info for you to contact me, no problem, YM (yahoo messenger) is “emcee_t”, my email is emcee_t@yahoo.com.  Contact me with any questions regarding AC and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.

Ok, so you’ve finally decided to take a leap of faith, after considerable research I’m sure, hotels, clubs, airline tickets, etc……..

So you’re probably thinking that this place is just filled to the gills with girls that will do anything you want at the drop of a dime.   You couldn’t be farther from the truth.  From my experience, if that’s what you want, girls that will do just about anything for a little money, don’t expect that in AC.  Now, onto the other side of that hand, if your honest up front when you first meet her, suggest your intentions, basically workout a game plan of the nights festivities, and she agrees, then you should be ok. For the rest of this post, it will be more like tips…..

Tipping – always tip, I can’t stress this enough, proper tipping will get you ahead in AC, whether it’s food at a restaurant (unless the food and service was terrible), the waitress and probably the cook, make about 400 PHP a day, that’s like $10 USD, even a tip of 20 PHP goes a long way, and they will remember that, I’ve walked into restaurants and got seated right away, and my food seemed better than the previous time.  Drinks at a club/bar, this will get you your drink of choice faster and colder, I’ve walked into clubs and the bartenders see me at the door, and before I can sit down, my drink is there, and usually made much stronger, ice cold, and for the normal price.  Or, for your lady of choice for the night, 500 PHP, they will remember this, they will gratefully appreciate, and probably tell their friends, and word spreads, AC is so damn small, think about it, your status rises.  Tipping goes so far, it’s like a status symbol in AC, and word of mouth is everything in this town.

Attitude – keep an open mind, this is not your home country, so it will not follow your countries customs, cultural ideals, etc.  You will probably see things in AC that will make you think that you’re “better” than this country.  If you do this, you will lose.  If you act like some type of snob, like your above everyone else because your country is better, then……why are you in AC?  Again, keep an open mind.

Money – Don’t bring Travelers Checks, that doesn’t always work in AC.  I recommend you bring enough cash to cover your complete trip, hotel, daily expenses, etc….I’ve went to AC with $10,000 USD and put it in the hotel safe, and never had any problems.  Now, I’m not telling you to bring that amount of money with you, nor am I telling you that all hotel’s safe’s are “safe”, again, I’ve been to AC so many times, that I know hotel owners, managers, security guards, etc…..so yeah, tipping and proper talk goes along way in AC.  Also, don’t go around flashing or showing your money….big mistake.  You go exchange your Euro, Dollars, Pounds, whatever it may be, and you get a fat stack of Peso’s, and you feel like you can buy the town, that’s great, but don’t act like it.  If you walk into every club showing how much money you have, they will basically rape you for all your money before you know what has happened, remember that these women are basically professionals, and will fleece you as fast as they can, now, not all women are like this in AC, but c’mon, if you see some drunk yank with a lot of money, just throwing it around, wouldn’t you do the same thing, think about it…..also, i don’t trust the ATM’s there, been raped too many times to remember at the ATM’s, magical fee’s on my invoice, not getting any money out, but being charged on the invoice, etc…..but I do bring a credit card or two, never know what will happen.

What to bring with you - pack your bag light, it’s always warm in AC, rains occasionally, a lot in the rainy season.  If your concerned about the “health” of the bargirls, bring your own condoms, from my experience ( I’m big) I can’t get what i usually use, so bring your own.  If you care about how you present yourself, bring an iron, to make your clothes presentable, there seems to be like 1 hot iron in the hotels.  Bring a multi-vitamin, you don’t realize how many vitamins and minerals you lose in a night of drinking, wake up eat your breakfast, take  vitamin, and your back on track.  Vitamin-B12, B-Complex, this little wonder vitamin will help your body process alcohol…..i take two before i go out drinking and two more when I get back to the room, works wonders.  Ever wonder why your face gets red when you drink?  Your liver is lacking an enzyme that processes alcohol, this effects millions of people worldwide, the B12 and B Complex, helps this process.

Water - if it’s not bottled water, don’t drink it!!!!!  I didn’t drink it, after a long night of drinking, and too many tequila shots, I just wanted the taste of tequila out of my mouth, I merely swished the glass of water in my mouth, and spit it out, the next morning I woke up with a fever of 104 degrees, the girl with me at the time wouldn’t touch me, my body was on fire, I was shitting out everything I’d ate in the last 5 years, and everything I ate or drank, I was shitting out in about 10 minutes, it was a terrible experience, but not as bad as the Thai Black Death I had years ago, but that is a different story all together.

And, that’s it for tonight, kind of drunk, and I’m counting down the days to my next AC trip, there’s nothing like it, your first trip or your 20th or 50th, or whatever it is, it’s never the same, and that’s the charm and mystique of AC, whether your a Cherry Boy or an AC Veteran, happy monger, and salute.   Bedroom Bully signing off.

February 27th, 2010

Hey AC Funpage viewers, this is the “Bedroom Bully” aka “Solution”, the first new author to this fantastic, informative website.  I guess a little biography is in order, hmmmmmmmmmmm, where to start, ok, I’ll do it like this, keep reading……

Name - Bedroom Bully

Aliases - Solution, Big T, Songtan Slayer, Thailand Typhoon, Mr. Gate 2, Green Eyed Bandit

Age - 29

Sex - yes please

Height - 5 ft 10 in

Weight - a muscely 195 lbs

Eyes - Green

Location - currently overseas

Children - 3, 2 boys, 1 daughter

Married - 3 times, currently to a stunning Filipina

Favorite quote - “Believe nothing you see, and only half of what you hear,anything and  everything can be fabricated for you to believe.” – so damn true

Values - Honor, Respect and Discipline

Ok, I’m not going to continue that “profile” style anymore………here’s a quick rundown of little old me………..I’ve had a professional career for the last 10 years, my job has frequently placed me in many exotic locations…..Korea, Japan, Singapore, Thailand, Malaysia, Philippines, China, Iran, Iraq, Dubai, India, and Australia, and some other places I can’t recall at the moment ( i’m 8 beers in).

My favorite place out of those is, of course, the Philippines.  I’ve been to Manila, Makati, Cebu, Samar, Catbalogan, and of course our beloved Angeles City.  I’ve been to Angeles City 24 times that I remember, so much drinking, damn, may have a problem, haha, no one likes a quiter!!!! I know, humbly, that my 24+ trips to Angeles City, doesn’t even compare to my “Cloney” – J-Reg.  But, me and him have walked almost an identical path for the last 10 years, and we didn’t even know it until recently.  There’s just something about Angeles City, different vibe, girls actually seem to want to get to know you personally, not so stand offish, not so “bang-for-buck” like so many countries I’ve been to,

I guess I’m trying to say, that Angeles City, is just an overall more personable place.  Ok, I feel like I’m rambling on now, I’m just saying that I’m grateful for the opportunity to share my knowledge of my times and experiences in Angeles City, thank you “Cloney”, if anyone has any questions regarding AC or the Philippines in general, any questions at all, I’ll be more than happy to answer them to the best of my ability.  Oh yeah, I’m going on my official 25th trip in March, I’m willing to share a beer and talk with anyone, well, intelligently share a beer and talk with anyone.  Again, thanks “Cloney”.

February 25th, 2010

Next Monday, March 1^st, The Alaska Club will be having their annual “Spring Fling” party.

Pretty good deal here at a pretty good bar.  If you can make it, you’ll be treated to a FREE dinner, FREE raffle prizes, FREE games with the girls, and of course 50’s and 60’s music all night long.

One of the games to be played will be “STUMP THE CHUMP”.  It goes like this:  If you request a 50’s or 60’s song and Daddy Jerry doesn’t have it, he will buy YOU a drink.   If he has the song you requested, then you buy a ladies drink for the girl of your choice.

If you plan to go, be sure to show up early.  Alaska tends to fill up fast on these party big nights.